i just prefer to think of the homleess as outdoorsy. so shine on urban campers!

It's another fine WTF Wednesday over here in the frozen tundra that is Casa de Tampson.  Way too cold to go outside, so why not spend the entire week watching Youtube videos?  I know I did.  

I, personally, don't see any relation between Lady Gaga and Uchimura, although maybe he was attempting to kill himself with the quad double, I don't know. 

For those who don't know who Liz Kotler is, and I'm one of those people, she performed a toe-on Strong on UB back in 2003.  The routine itself is rather beastly, but that move is awesome.  Sounds exactly like a Chili Four Loko burrito. 

And yes, Hong Su Jong most certainly does "let loose." 

*sorry it's so tiny, click to enlarge*

I have to let these ones speak for themselves.  I'd like to think that Alicia's correlation to Mr. Bean is open to interpretation, and lies within all of us. 

i told my parents i only want one thing for christmas this year: stop friending me on facebook.

It's our favorite day of the week!  That' right, it's...

And by "favorite" I mean "stupidest" because everyone calls it Humpday, and I hate that.  WTF Wednesday is so much better. 

Our first WTF comes courtesy of NastiaFan101, maker of montages, capturer of high quality videos.

Our friend Fanny was just minding his own business, checking out some close-to-the-bar catches of Demy.  Nothing out of the usual here, so it would seem...

 Let's have a look-see, a little closer this time.

There it is.

That is so wrong.  There are about five girls on that team who would get into adult videos WAY before Demy.

Moving on...

I wouldn't call them a failure.  They were just cursed with following the 1996 gold medal winning team.  And the 1992 bronze medal winning team.  And the should-have-medalled-but-got-screwed 1988 team .  And competing before both the 2004 and 2008 silver medal winning teams.

Speaking of 1988...

I'd say that was most definitely NOT a happy ending.  For her. 

I know very little about Sam Sheehan, other than she competed for Mary Lee Tracy, and that she won a medal at 2002 Worlds on floor.  I know nothing of her intellectual capacity, but she HAS to know that wearing a tube top, taking a picture, cropping off all existence of clothing and then using it as your Facebook default might not be the smartest thing to do. 

That tumbnail for the tootin' bathtub baby cousins sure is cute.  But I have no clue what it has to do with the 1983 Jr. International.  The girls aren't THAT young.

I can't think of any Chinese gymnasts that would ever make me think "Baby got back!"  Baby, yes.  Back, no.

The Georgia Gym Dogs make me cry too, Jessica Simpson.  They really do.  

I wonder what James Joyce has to do with Yelena Piskun.  Maybe she was super smart?  Or was that Andreea Cacovean?  She did crossword puzzles.... in ENGLISH!

I can't even tell... are those chimps?  Or squirrels?  Or one chimp and one squirrel?  Bross does not resemble a chimp or a squirrel. 

And there we have it.  Another fine week full of Youtube WTFs.

well, congratulations. normally you dress like a fantasy of a perverted japanese business man with a very dark specific fetish but i actually dig this look. yay.

So, I don't even know what these are.  I've just been embracing the snipping tool in my boredom, I suppose.  I blame it on my work schedule.  I go early enough that I can't really plan much for the beginning of my day, but late enough that I have plenty of time to sit around and photoshop stupid pictures.

I also blame 80sgymfan, over at IG.  Posting these sites so that no one has any choice but to spend all day watching HV of old meets.  For SHAME.

Seriously.  Don't check out http://www.youtubegymnasticsarchive.site40.net unless you have ALL DAY to spend watching videos.

oh my god! I care so little, i almost passed out.

It's WTF WEDNESDAY!

My, has it been so long?  It has.  So I had a ton of garbage to wade through, but I did manage to find a few gems.  

I don't know that this example really warrants an explanation.  Anyone who has played soccer in a 40 degree Minnesota fall can tell you that getting hit in the jugs by a somewhat solid object HURTS.  So when Brossie got slugged in the rack by the UB in 09, I imagine it was something like getting kicked in the nuts.  

 Impending doom: 

Actual doom:

Moving on.

To be fair, Amy was amazing at many things.  Farting being the least of them, I'm sure.

Oh come on.  Her dismount wasn't THAT bad....

Dude, that is so exactly how I feel when I watch Maroney's vault from USAs.  A new day truly has come.  It would be worth her while to do a FX to the vocal stylings of the great Celine Dion, I might add.  If Ferrari can have grunts and moans in her FX, then Maroney can have the lovely Dion in hers.  That's all I'm saying. 

More gymnasts need to associate themselves with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.  I didn't even know they made a music video!  God I'm old.  I want to say Aly would be the Donatello of the group, but I don't know that she's so much a brilliant scientist.  Maybe she is, I don't know.  Alicia is totally Michelangelo though.  That I know.  

Dude, what is with Amy Chow?  She pulled up a bunch of wacky hits.  

It's so true.  I always laugh.  

you look terrible. i look awesome.

I'm a little late for WTF WEDNESDAY.  My bad.  I wish I could say it was because I was busy, or had something really mega important to do.  That was not the case.  I'm just lazy.

This is just a random mishmash of wtfs.  For whatever reason, Youtube is getting off on not recommending me anything gym related.  It's like, geez, can't a girl watch one video on Greyson Chance or Westboro "Baptist" Church (rage stroke) without getting four billion recommendations regarding those two topics?  Yeeshk.

So here we are.

 
I love Yang Bo.  I watch literally billions of videos of her every day.  Did I want to mow people down with a tank when she fell off beam every time?  Yes I did.  So I get that.

I don't know what a shuttlecock is.  Don't really care.  I just like the word.  Shuttlecock.

I should have checked into which exact video from the 1996 Olympics they were referring to with the Love me CHOU CHOU creepy baby toy.  I can only assume something Romanian.  (Get it???  CHOO CHOO.  I'm so funny.)

Perhaps it is that same video that led us to the Magic Bowl Potty Training clip.  1996 Olympics = potty training?  Not so much.  Sydney, yes.  Atlanta, no.

i've grown weary of your insults. they sting. and they make me want to punch your face.

Another rousing edition of ...

WTF WEDNESDAY

Kind of light this week.  For several reasons.  I got a job, so that's awesome/sucks.  And there just aren't as many wacky things out there these days. 

Let us begin.

Something about Memmel screams herb, apparently.  This isn't the first time Youtube has made this connection. 

Now, I think it's a little harsh to call A-Sac a global crisis. It's not like the world imploded when she fell off of beam.  Well, maybe a little bit.  But it so wasn't a global crisis. 

And what the FUDGE does UCLA have to do with breastfeeding an eight year old???  What does ANYTHING have to do with breastfeeding an eight year old??  That's just probably the creepiest thing I've ever seen, and how or why it was associated with the UCLA gymnastics team is just beyond me.  

So they released the mascots for the London Olympics today.  Cute video.  But creep-ass mascots. 

I don't even know what they are.  The five minute video did nothing to explain what the heck it was.  It shows a man retiring, then going home and welding these... things.  Then the kids play with the things, which was kind of cute.  But then a rainbow summons the things, and they have to go off to serve the Olympics.  And I haven't even had any acid today.  

It's a one-eyed... thing.  When I hear "one-eyed" I only think of one thing.  And it's not the Olympics.

you two should be wetting yourselves with shame.

And now, it's time for another edition of what I like to call

WTF WEDNESDAY. 

Sometimes, you see things that just make you cock your head to the side, and stare awkwardly.

Let us begin.

I'm going to go ahead and assume that Komova is just one of those young kids that mindlessly accepts every Facebook request that she gets.  If that's not the case, then... I think we know why the Russians have better expression than the rest of us.

So, speaking of Komova, that girl brings up the weirdest suggestions on Youtube.

If you'll remember, a few weeks ago I noted that Youtube is one big conspiracy that tries to get you to watch videos about sleep walking dogs, when all you really want to see are the latest Pac routines.

Because I enjoyed a few routines from the tiny Russian, Youtube believes that would also enjoy these:

Ok, the guns I get, because of the guns in her latest FX.  But the air crash investigation?  Not too sure what that's about.  But the one that really gets me is the one about the tank.  Some gymnasts truly do remind me of tanks.  Vika is not one of them.

The one gymnast who seems to draw more bizarre YT recommendations than even Komova is our dear He Kexin.

To start, unzipping anything and having it in your face is bad.  So we'll move on.  Brain damage and, what I believe goes on to say triple colon cancer??  I'd love to know what correlation that has with He Kexin's UB.  The "lies" and the lame one about being too old I get.  Yes yes, she's underage, that's old news.  What I don't understand is how Kexin = Joe Jonas.  Maybe teenage girls really like her.

Jordyn Wieber pulls up some weird ones.  Such as:

A little young to be a legend, perhaps.  No longer a myth after Pac, that's for sure.  But what she has to do with Akon, I have absolutely no clue.

This one, while kind of mind-boggling, actually makes a lot of sense.

As does this.

But not so much this.

Finally, we have these poor Chinese girls.  I for one would love to believe that there is some relation between Tan Sexin and super galactic beat manipulators.

But the biggest WTF in all the WTFs is this: what does some little boy bending over and checking out his junk complete with creepy smiley face have to do with a Chinese gymnast?  I'm ok never knowing the answer to that.

I'm sure we all have WTFs in our lives.  But if you're watching videos of Komova or Kexin, then you probably have a few extra ones.

when a new mom hears a baby cry, her you-know-what's fill up with you-know-what, and then her shirt gets, you know... that would be funny.

Oh crazy Youtube.

Michael Scott got it right.  What an incredible waste of time.

Now, I remember the days before Youtube.  If you wanted to see Morgan White's new move on bars, then you had to wait an hour and download the 30 second clip.  And then you kept 700 gymnastics clips on your hard drive, which was only like 512 MB.

Now, before that we used the ancient art of "tape trading" via the GTTC, or the Gymnastics Tape Trading Club.  If you wanted to see Omelianchik's floor exercise, then you got online, found someone with a tape of 1985 Worlds, and then waited three weeks for the copy to be sent to you.

I took pride in my massive tape collection.  I was wise and gymeducated because I had seen all these routines that the normal people had not.  I knew my shit.

Then effing Youtube comes out.  Now, anyone who watched one night of the Olympics can get online and search for videos of their "favorite gymnast", watch a few, and then consider themselves gurus of the sport.

Now, I have nothing against couch gymnasts.  In fact, The Couch Gymnast is like one of my favorite websites.  They can be very knowledgeable, classy and insightful fans.  Then... there are the other ones.

These "fans" have never done gym.  They've never coached, judged, or even been to a meet.  The only thing they've seen is three nights of the Olympics, and of course, NBC tells you what to think anyway.  So then they race to the computer, type in "underage chinese gymnast" and then proceed to leave one billion comments on handstands, start values, and age limits.  Uh, did you know about ANY of that an hour ago?  No?  Oh, you learned it all on the internet in fifteen minutes.  I see. 

Anyway, I blame Youtube for this, a little bit.  At the same time, we can all thank the gymnastics gods for the exposure to routines and gymnasts we'd never in a million years be able to see.  I can spend hours every single day watching routine after routine after routine.

So this is where I get concerned.  Youtube, in all of its techy glory, keeps track of what I watch, and then makes suggestions on what else I might like.  Awesome!  So if I watch lots of beam videos, then surely they'll suggest even MORE beam videos, right??

Not so much.

Instead, I get referred to the most random, bizarre videos of all time.

Chellsie Memmel = crank.  Got it.

So is Lilia Danielle or Goliath?  Or Judge Judy....  I can't stand that woman.  I really, really can't.

Some might argue this is accurate.  Not me though.  I like Sui Lu.  She wears cute socks.

Um.  Ok.

The 1991 World event finals were wild, indeed.  Kim Gwang Suk on bars, anyone??

Now, I'm a lady.  A classy lady.  I have very little urinal experience (when I worked at Circus Pizza, I once mistook one of those urinal cakes for some sort of minty air freshener.  I was very wrong.)  I'm not sure what the rules of etiquette are regarding peeing in public, but I have a hard time imagining they have much to do with Mariya Livchikova's beam routine.

I have like a billion of these.

So yeah.  Crazy, time-wasting Youtube trying to get me to watch videos about sleep walking dogs all because I was interested in the Tkatchev process.  Eff me.