Happy Un-Thanksgiving

That time of year has arrived yet again.  Everyone blathers on about what they're thankful for, and that's all very well and good.  But I haven't got time for all of that.

Instead, let's focus on:

WHAT I AM MOST CERTAINLY NOT THANKFUL FOR.  

1. Tour Costumes

  
I mean really.  Who on the creative team thought this was a good idea?  "I know!  Let's put the teenagers in sequined bras and sheer skirts!  The kids will love it!"

2. The Two Per Country Rule

Man, what a nightmare.  I get feels just looking at this picture.  And I know people will object with "Oh, but was there an uproar about Grishina, Yao Jinnan, or random British/Australian girls??  They got shafted too!!"  Please.  That's not to say they weren't disappointed, I'm sure they were.  But let's not pretend that their absence from the competition (maybe a healthy YJN aside) really made an impact in the medal standings.  This rule needs to be revisited.  If you score above 60, you deserve to be in the all around finals.  My apologies to the gymnasts from Qatar or whoever else benefits from the very top gymnasts in the world having to sit out.  

3.  The Death of Make It or Break It

I know, what has become of me?  This show was my bread and butter, and I loved to hate it.  But I still loved it.  And it breaks my heart that it had such a chintzy ending.  Random Olympic Trials in front of 20 people, where the contenders got to compete in 1-2 events.  Oh, and the whole drug bust.  Oh, and Payson becoming a bull dancer on the floor.  Oh, and that random girl who no one has ever heard of makes the team. 

4. Maroney's Selfies

Enough is enough.  Maroney is gorgeous.  There is no denying that.  I can't put my finger on why this bothers me.  Maybe it's because I'm old as sin, and us old people get bothered by things.  It could be that I'm just jealous, because I wish I lived in a world where I believed the universe deserved a picture of my sweet face every day of the week.  Maybe it's because Maroney is so beautiful and marketable as it is, that she doesn't need filters or to plaster her face on Twitter all day every day.  Less is more.  It doesn't matter what I think though, I think she'll make it big (ger?) no matter what she does. 

5. People Obsessed with Mustafina's Eye Makeup

  
Maybe it's because I was alive in 2004, but the smokey eye trend is not new to me.  Now, I have come very, very far in my Mustafina appreciation, trust me.  I love that she went all dramatic for the Games.  It's the grand ball, and you ought to dress up.  But it's not as if she INVENTED the trend.  I'm more obsessed with her eyebrows.  Where are the tutorials for those??

6. Scandalous Romanian Leotards

No.  No no no no no.  

7. Adults Acting Like Crazy Bitches

   
You can't expect people to stay friends forever, especially as they grow up and grow apart.  But the mean girl thing really should dissipate after high school.  It's really old and tired on adults.

8. Ferarri's Leotard Choices

Props for being different, but how many holes does a leotard really need?

9. Fanfic Creepers

Writing graphic stories about largely underage children engaging in sexual adventures is not cool.  I don't care what you say or what your justification is, I am never, ever going to be thankful for this.  Ever. 

Happy Thanksgiving Friends!