I'd be lying if I said I hadn't watched every episode since the pilot.
So imagine my excitement when I heard the news.
"Hooray!" I thought. "Nastia, being a former elite level gymnast, will surely be able to pull off some awesome gymnastics-themed plotline on the show!"
The possibilities are endless! Maybe she would play a rich, bitchy rival cheerleader. Or at least be one of the nameless background cheerleaders, I don't know. I'm either given her too much credit, or the show not enough, but I think Nastia would be able to pull off a number of characters.
So why does she always get stuck playing herself??
If she's only on the show for five seconds to hawk sandwiches, I'm going to lose it.
I felt the same way when she "starred" on Make It or Break It. Let me start by saying that you could cast the entire show with real gymnasts, and it would be infinitely better than it is now.
Tell me Alicia wouldn't make a fabulous bitch. The producers don't know what they're missing by not doing this. And with Jade as Kaylie, you would be able to have all sorts of emotional scenes. It's win-win.
But no. They drag Nastia in to play Elfi Schlegel.
Which is why I think Nastia, and her creeper agent, need to get her in some real roles ASAP. Here are a few she has already missed out on.
Again, she could have been a real gymnast on Make It or Break It.
And sticking with the gymnast/cheerleader theme, she would have been a fine pre-Britney on Glee.
Or Bring It On.
She could easily pass as a slutty college student
Plus, if she finds scripted characters too difficult, there is always the option of reality television.
She already has a bigger poof than Snooki
And I think she'd be a real hit on The Real Housewives of Plano.
So many possibilities! So Nastia, Creepy Agent, producers. Get on this. Bags of money are waiting.