A random girl's random gymnastics ramblings.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

you sing like diana ross and you dress like you own a magic chocolate factory.


I understand that it has been like, two weeks since the fact, but that doesn't matter because I am still seriously butthurt by Nastia Thunderstealer Liukin.  All summer long, she was all "Please, don't ask me about my comeback.  I want all of the attention to go to the real, competing gymnasts."  As it should be. What a welcome surprise that was, after the last 2+ years of her trying to play coy.  Here's my comeback FX routine, complete with 3 backhandsprings in a row!  Johnny R. stole my phone, and "leaked" videos of me doing bars!  Here's a picture of a rip on my hand!  What does this mean???

My response has always been, "Less talky, more el-grippy." 

My annoyed ambivalence turned into annoyed rage in the moments following Team USA's amazing prelims competition.  I was literally and figuratively high at 3 o'clock in the morning, due to a combination of painkillers and the stellar 100% hit ratio of the team.  No pill will ever make me happier than knowing that Miss Gabrielle Douglas was the 5th best gymnast in the world on that day.  My fingers were cramping from having to reload like ten different pages for quickhits every five seconds, but I still managed to update Twitter maniacally.  When from upon my Twitter stream should I see waning reports of the historical team competition, and increasing frenzy over something else...  whatever was it??

Fucking Nastia. 

That bitch managed to play coy, keep mum, drag everyone along, whatever you want to call it, for nearly THREE YEARS.  And chooses this moment, this ONE MOMENT that had nothing to do with her, and decides to make it all about her.  Forget Dougie rocking her meet, or Jordyn qualifying in 2nd (and making UB finals say whaaaa) or Vega overcoming insaneo nerves to nail her shit.  It was all about NASTIA.

I mean, I guess Team USA did alright without her.  But really, is a team without Nastia really a team?  Do results without her name at the top really even count?  Probably not. 


AND ANOTHER THING!  Did she really say that the reason the team did so well was because she gave them a pep talk right beforehand?  It was the result of her motivational speech that gave the kids a "light in their eyes."  That wasn't a light, that was the reflection of your salmon colored parachute blouse.  Stop trying to take credit for shit that you had nothing to do with! 

She could have chosen any other moment to make her grand announcement.  She could have waited until worlds was over.  She could have waited until the day after prelims.  She could have waited an HOUR after prelims, but chose not to.  Why?  Because Nastia (or her agent) needs all of the attention always.

I know I'm being harsh.  I actually like Gymnast Nastia.  Should she miraculously regain and upgrade her skills, then yay for her.  The team would be lucky to have her.  THAT SAID, I'll believe when I see it, and until then, STFU. 

25 comments:

  1. I love some Nastia bitchface and some Nastia gymnastics for that matter, but you are totally right to be pissed. WTF. Stealing the spotlight doesn't even begin to describe that shit.

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  2. THANK YOU! That is EXACTLY what went through my mind as soon as I heard the news. I've never liked her, but this certainly wiped away any doubts I may have had. It particularly bothers me that she was allowed on the Worlds / PanAm selection committee while planning this. Letting the inmates run the asylum? NOT COOL.

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  3. THANK YOU! This is so overdue but I am glad somebody said it!!! Alicia is all humble pie and I just had a quick chat any they did it all themselves, but Nastia is like, well my speech was so fucking inspirational that was all they needed. I am also so with Sarah, who let her on the selection committee! Plus Martha knew she was training so it makes it even worse...so freaking messed up!!

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  4. good lord, its not like she made her announcement on the night of the team final or the AA final. it was only prelims. calm the fuck down. and is it really so hard to believe that a pep talk from nastia would inspire these girls? she was competeing a world championship when most of them were 10 or 11 years old.

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  5. I totally agree, Spanny. I know that she probably didn't mean to sound as stuck up and self centered as she did, but the bottom line is, she did. The thing that bothers me is the fact that she refused and refused and refused to answer questions for years, and then she HAS to steal Raisman, Wieber and the other girls' thunder? It's just rude.

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  6. I'm glad someone was just as mad about this as I was. Although I know I could never put it as eloquently as you, Spanny! Its been nothing but teases and coy responses for years. Then she finally says yeah i'm coming back,(which personally i was hoping for a no comeback) but it was the audacity of her timing that really irked me! Ugh!

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  7. This. So much of this.

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  8. Completely agree. It will, however, be very interesting to see her progress over the next (less than) year!

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  9. There's a video of her bars? Where? oO

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  10. "I understand that it has been like, two weeks since the fact, but that doesn't matter because I am still seriously butthurt by Nastia Thunderstealer Liukin."

    That just made me laugh out loud at my desk. Now let me say, if she can get back into shape and actually contribute then fine.....I'm just going to be really annoyed if she tries and fails........but instead of saying "I wasn't the best person for the team" makes up some excuse why she decided it wasn't best for her yada yada. Time will tell.

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  11. I agree SO FREAKING HARD.

    That, and I understand they'll choose whoever is best for the London team and can contribute the most, not whoever "deserves" it, but...honestly, there are only a few spots on the Olympic team. She got to walk away from Beijing as the golden girl, the champion, while girls like Alicia and Chellsie got to walk away feeling like crap or like they hadn't gotten to contribute anything at all. And now she's trying to swoop in and take a space away from one of them, or from one of the younger girls who have never had a chance at all, so she can feel like the all-star all over again? I'm sorry, that feels so incredibly selfish and attention-seeking. You have nothing left to prove, Nastia, go home and enjoy your gold medal and let someone else shine for a change. Nobody can take it from you; stop trying to take what other people have.

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  12. haha A-FREAKING-MEN. Nastia's moment was in 2008- she performed beautifully at the Olympics. But why can't she move on? Cause like someone says, it always has to be about Nastia all the time. And somehow she hasn't received the widespread post olympic attention that Shawn has (I can just see her whining to her Dad, "But I won the all around."). I stopped liking her the minute I saw an interview that she did after Shawn won the balance beam gold medal and she felt the need to point out that the all around was the gold medal that mattered. It will also piss me off if all she has to do is train 7 months, put together a decent uneven bars routine and then she makes the olympic team. My how that will pump up that already massive ego.

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  13. Word. For anyone to say that it wasn't a tactic to steal thunder, well, whoever you are - lay off the drugs. Girlfriend has had wks, months, and years to answer the question and could have held it in for another couple weeks but chose that particular day to let it out. Um, why? Well there's only one logical reason - she needed attention! And knowing she was about to make the decision to and still remain part of the selection committee to hear Marta's assessment of her friends/teammates (aka potential UB competition) is plain ruthless.

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  14. Nastia is a publicity whore. Is this new to you people?

    She was overrated as a gymnast. She benefitted from a high starting value on bars. Take away bars and she wins no AA medal. She backed into her floor medal because everyone else had real routines they messed up. Nastia code whored a fucking double front and nothing else.

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  15. I'd take a codewhored double front over a lame DOUBLE PIKE OR TUCK any day.

    But yeah Nastia is a media whore.

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  16. "She got to walk away from Beijing as the golden girl, the champion, while girls like Alicia and Chellsie got to walk away feeling like crap or like they hadn't gotten to contribute anything at all."

    Well, Alicia wouldn't have felt like crap if she hadn't y'know... FALLEN TWICE in tf.

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  17. Ha, tell us what you really think, Spanny.

    Yeah, I was than impressed by her timing too. And I still hope she doesn't make that team, not out of spite to her, but because it's a small team and there are other people I'd rather see get their shot. It's completely irrational - I feel like gymnasts who have been training hard all quad deserve it more than her - as if Nastia hasn't put in her million hours in the gym already, and as if you get points for effort anyway. But that's how I feel. She was a great gymnast in her time, and brought qualities to the sport that were severely lacking by 2008. But I've moved on, and so has almost everyone else, apparently.

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  18. Your hate for Nastia outside of gymnastics is pathetic. I'll never understand how a someone can hate someone they don't know.

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  19. I agree anon 8:24. Hating on someone you don't even know is pathetic. Creating a blog about your hatred is even more pathetic.

    Everyone is so upset about the TIMING of this announcement. Big effing deal! It was prelims! Who cares? The world was not watching. Would it have been better to have a press conference like Shawn and sign on with the BBC to follow her comeback. And for everyone to say Chellsie did it the right way by training quietly and coming back to competition, Chellsie has never received the media attention Shawn and Nastia have. She also competed in a level 10 comp last January and tweeted about training regularly, so you can't say she was entirely quiet about it either.
    If Nastia gets back to Beijing shape with her routines, I hope like hell she's on that team! The US needs her bars and to think otherwise is foolish.

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  20. "Well, Alicia wouldn't have felt like crap if she hadn't y'know... FALLEN TWICE in tf."

    I didn't say she didn't fall. She just wants a chance to be remembered for something other than those two falls (despite years of fantastic, dedicated gymnastics so many haters like to pretend haven't happened). I think it's a bit stank of Nastia to be leaping in the way of that so people won't forget for a second how wonderful she is. Believe it or not, Nastia has fallen in competitions many times herself, and she got every chance to come back and be remembered for a great performance instead. God forbid someone else have the same opportunity.

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  21. Hey Anonymous 9:26 aka Ally from GymnasticsCoaching. Did you totally miss the part where she says she actually likes gymnast Nastia? But you take it as she really hates Nastia, and is really jealous of her? Stop creating drama where there is none. Not everyone is as enamored with Nastia as you are. That's probably because we're all sooooo jealous.

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  22. How do you know whom I know or don't know? That isn't anyone from gymcoaching that is Nastia fan101. He posts under a million names to defend the media whore.

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  23. totally agree!!!! she's a total media whore, who needs the spotlight all to herself. she better not make the team, because there are others who have been working hard all quad, such as bross, wieber, maroney, raisman, sacramone, etc who deserve it more than she does. she'll do one event, and if she steals a spot from a girl who can do bars AND other events, i'm going to be SO angry

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